Fat Crazy Bitch doesn't go away

So fat crazy bitch who stole my crazy bastard of a man, just can't leave it be. She's got to stir up shit and smear it all over my place of work (we're coworkers). Let's start this from the beginning as far as work is concerned. (NOTE: The personal side was posted last week HERE)

Last Tuesday (9 days ago), she sent this email to security, the head of her department, my friends and myself. My edits are in brackets as such: [[...]]


From: [[Crazy Bitch]]
Sent: Tuesday
To: [[Karen's coworker friend #1]];[[Karen's coworker friend #2]];[[Karen's coworker friend #3]]
Cc: [[LastName]], Karen; [[Department Manager]]; [[Karen's friend]]
Subject: FW: how does this sound?
Importance: High

Some of you know the person in the article below [[Artivle removed -- it's a story about this guy getting arrested for robbing a gas station with pepper spray -- he denies it. Yes it includes his picture]]. He was in attendance at the [[company]] picnic this year [[Note: He was with me]]. For personal reasons, [[Bastards full name]] has been told not to contact myself or Karen [[LastName]] or show up at our place of residences or work. Security has been notified.

He is 5’6”, 166 pounds, Caucasian, brown hair, hazel eyes and 27 years old. He drives a light pinky-purple Beretta. If you see him, please contact security.

[[Crazy Bitch]]


After this, I was done with the situation and informed the boy that I wanted no further contact. I told him this in person and then responded to his repeated texts and calls with an email explaining it again and including, among other things, that "I want nothing from you (including emails, texts, phone calls,IMs, presents, cards -- I'm just trying to move on here)."

I have also kept a strictly business relationship with her. I'm moving on here. Then TODAY, she sends the following email. Note that I am not included this time. Also note that the friends this is sent to don't even know her. they're my friends. They know the boy through me. They don't know her. And of course all responded immediately by sending it to me and asking why the hell she was sending them this shit.


From: [[Crazy Bitch]]
Sent: Thursday
To: [[Karen's coworker friend #1]];[[Karen's coworker friend #2]];[[Karen's coworker friend #3]]
Cc: [[Department Manager]]
Subject: Recant
Importance: High

With regards to the email sent last week, I would like to recant the statements. I have looked into [[The Boy's]] story and it turns out that he was telling the truth that he is innocent. He is not a threat and I believe the dust has settled for all parties involved. I apologize for the mix-up. I have already apologized to[[The Boy]] and chances are you might see him on the premises so please know that he is welcome here.

[[Crazy Bitch]]


What. The. Fuck. She just can't leave it alone -- she has to create drama. shes already told everyone (after the first email) that she was afraid he'd try to hurt her and that she bought a gun. She's had people escort her to her car for fear he'll attack her. She took my pepper spray for protection. And now shes dating and is recanting the crazy email she never should have sent out in the first place?

What. The. Fuck.

This is my livelihood, yall -- this is my JOB. And she dragging this shit all over work. And aside from that do neither her nor the boy think that this could possibly hurt me? that I'm pretty heart broken over all this shit and am trying to MOVE ON?

And I'm sitting here feeling like im the crazy one and the one creating this drama. But I know that I'm not. I've cut off all communication with either of them from my end. I'm not the one emailing our coworkers and reporting people to security. Why has this drama come into my life? Why can't they just LEAVE ME BE? And now I'm "likely" to run into them together in the parking lot at work? GREAT! Ugh!

Inspired by "A Softer World"

After reading A Softer World: Comic 242

Is it sad or awesome or just messed up that I can totally see myself in my pajamas on the side of the road next to a friend and a dead body. Then me saying "Well thanks for bringing ME into it."

Then proceeding to lecture someone on the fact that "you can't just put a body in the fucking trunk because it's not like the bloods just gonna go away. You'll be reading about 'the strange stain in the trunk' on CNN and interviews with the neighbors you borrowed a shovel from. For fucks sake, man -- just buy the damn shovel!"

"And I don't dig. You're the one who did it -- I'll hold the damn flashlight or something."

"You know, we wouldn't have to dig a hole if we dumped the body in the ocean. Dexter dumped the bodies in the ocean -- maybe we should try that."
"Didn't treasure hunters find those bodies?"
"Yeah -- but then he dumped them in a new spot in the ocean."
"Oh. Well, we don't have a boat"
"Well we threw ethics out the window about an hour ago, we could just steal one."

I <3 Dexter

Remember when I said Dexter was awesome? Well, I long ago finished watching both seasons. I loved them so much that I bought them both on DVD -- and we all know how rarely I buy DVDs. Thats just how awesome it is.

Season three starts in September. And I Just can't miss that -- so I called up Comcast and subscribed to Full cable plus Showtime. So Not just Dexter -- but Food Network, and Sci-Fi too! I haven't had cable in over 3 years! Man, I'm not going to want to go out for a week. Or two. Or more -- I'm depressed dammit, I can watch as much TV as I want.

Would you buy this shirt?

I'm working on some shirts for my friends store (The Belvidere Market). This is a first draft kind of thing. I love the idea -- but I'm not loving it on the shirt. Any advice on composition? I think it would be helped by adding her slogan: "The country store with attitude" -- but I can't find a good way to put that on the shirt.

Draft of a Shirt I'm designing

And Leah, if you'd like one of the shirts we print for her store, i'd be happy to send you one -- make up for never printing that shirt for you ;)

This calls for new hair.

Sometimes you have a really fucking shitty week. Sometimes you wake up Monday morning looking forward to lunch with the guy you're falling in love with - the guy who has been your best friend for months - the hot sexy motherfucker who can make you laugh even when you forgot to take your klonopin.

Sometimes that hot motherfucker lies to your face. Sometimes you find out that hes been fucking your coworker who's 200 pounds heavier and 20 years older than you. And if you're having a really fucking terrible week, they'll both lie to your face and you'll get lost and confused and realize that they're not only bad people - but they're fucking insane too.

That ugly crazy chick whos fucking the man you love might even go as far as to put in a complaint to security and send an email to all your coworking friends to say that this man *insert picture of hot man here* is harassing her and YOU! And she'll tell everyone that shes afraid he'll kill her -- She'll buy a gun and you'll give her your pepper spray because some people are simple and need such talisman to feel safe.

And then the motherfucker you loved will grasp at straws and try to get either one of you back -- he'll go to her house and she'll show him the gun. Will he get shot? No, no my friend -- he'll actually end up playing with the gun and fucking her again. While the ugly fat bitch is on her period. Without a condom. And your now evil enemy will even tell you how good the man you loved is in bed. She'll actually brag to you about it at work.

And my friends. This is where you bale. Run the fucking other way. Not that they'll let you. And yes, your unlucky ass will run into them dining together in public. You're a lucky one, you! So lucky that your cell phone company informs you that you can't block a single number -- they don't have that capability. And then you're just gonna have to suck it up and cry while they text you and call you and just refuse to leave you alone -- they're crazy, this is what crazy people do.

And when you sit in the bath or eat with your friends or drive your car, there will be nothing else you can possibly think about. It will consume you.

This my friends, is the kind of bull shit that calls for new hair.

New Hair.

I'm going to go smoke a fucking cigarette. No, I don't smoke anymore. Don't judge me, it's been a bad week.

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