I HATE (*some* -- no wait, *most*) gum chewers.

My reasons:

1. You look disgusting chewing gum -- especially you open mouth smackers -- it's gross, dude.

2. You sound horrifyingly gross. The noise you make makes me wish my ear drum was busted. (And yes -- this goes for you closed mouth chewers too -- I can still hear it). I actually think a lot of my problems could be curtailed if I just had one deaf ear. No really -- I'm 100% serious here. If I only had 1 good ear, I could just have the gum smackers, the popcorn chompers -- and lord help -- MAINLY the Ice chompers -- just sit on my deaf side. Problem solved.

3. For some reason -- god knows why -- you feel like you are entitled to spit your gum out where ever you please. No your not. And you smokers aren't entitled to throw down your cigarette butts anywhere you want either!

And reason number 3, my friends, is why I am home posting on my lunch break from work. Because I stepped in some assholes gum. And I did not realize this before I got to work and sat on my leg -- also my shoe -- and got gum all over my ass and all over my friends office chair. I'm fucking pissed.

Some days I hate people. Enraged hate. And today seems to be one of those days.

*Updated on further thought: I think it should be my right ear. That way I could drive people without hearing them too -- and my good ear would be to the window when I'm driving so I could still hear the police sirens and such.

I think this plan has merit. Though I cannot actually make myself deaf (I've thought of it a few times -- particularly shoving a ballpoint pen into my ear canal as a spur-of-the-moment fix). I need to somehow become deaf on only 1 side by accident. I acknowledge that my hate for these sounds is irrational. Though I also realize that apparently no amount of prozac, paxil, effexor, zoloft, cymbalta, klonopin or therapy is going to ease the intense rage that fills me when I hear these things. I think people don't believe how much this bothers me. I seriously wish I was deaf on one side. And I'm not just saying that like "I wish I was dead" or something -- I want to live the rest of my life with 1 deaf ear. I don't really want it to hurt though and I don't want it to be visibly messed up -- Can we just pop the ear drum?

Questions for the "Lost" viewers

I've never seen Lost so maybe they have perfectly valid explanations for these things but I just want to know.

1. How does that fat guy stay fat when he's on a freaking deserted island?

2. How do some of the guys stay clean shaven? And what about the ones with the perfectly trimmed goatees -- whats up with that? Even if they did have razors in their luggage -- they should have long since gone dull.

Blue Beetle: Making your illegal parking look less suspicious through my own - Since 2006

I bought the new Seether album. It sounded pretty good in clips and the radio single "Fake It" is kinda awesome. And I gotta say, some of these songs would be way better if you cut out the pointless screaming. And hey, I'm all for some screaming rock music -- but it really seems to detract from these particular songs.

I'm speaking especially about "Like Suicide" & and "FMLYHM". Both of them would be rated 4 or even 5 stars if they just didn't have the damn screaming parts. They're both awesome -- aside from that. I'm not particularly good at talking intelligently about music so I guess the best I can do is -- the rhythm, lyrics & general sound start out excellent (seriously awesome) -- and then the screaming cuts in. And come on -- can I get a version with that cut out? 'Cause I was feeling it right before that.

*Sigh* They could have been my new favorite songs but no...


Yet more random shit about me. Because Tel made me.

I feel I should maybe apologize for all the memes lately -- but dammit, I like them. And this one was Tel's idea. Yep. Slide that blame right on down... ;)

4 jobs I had in my life:
1. Daycare supervisor (4 years)
2. RGIS Auditor (I counted inventory at various stores)
3. Hostess @ Steak & Ale
4. Police Dispatcher

(Just for the sake of completeness, I've also been a cashier @ Target and worked @ Barnes & Noble)

4 movies I would watch over and over:
1. Harry Potter (All of them)
2. Old School
3. Constantine
4. The Italian Job

4 places I have lived:
1. 312 Lance Way (Birmingham)
2. Ascot Place Apartments (Birmingham)
3. Central Dorms @ UAH (Huntsville)
4. South East Housing (AKA Ghetto East) @ UAH (Huntsville)


4 TV shows that I watch:
1. Firefly (DVDs -- all the time)
2. Life
3. Medium
4. Ghost Whisperer

4 places I have been:
1. Canterbury, England
2. Lucern, Switzerland
3. Venice, Italy
4. Dinkelsbuhl, Germany

4 people who email me (regularly):
1. Crystal
2. Erin
3. Beth
4. Nathan

4 of my favorite foods:
1. Pizza
2. French Fries
3. Pasta (preferably with Marinera & always have to have some kind of meat)
4. Mexican

4 places I would rather be right now:
1. *Private & Mushy*
2. Vacationing in Europe
3. Recovering in the hospital from having plastic/reconstructive surgery preferably on my arms but also everywhere else.
4. Hanging out with friends either at my place watching a movie or in a restaurant.

4 Things I am looking forward to this (2008)year:
1. Getting a raise at work
2. Having a relationship with a great guy (person to be determined).
3. Getting even closer to my degree and proving that I can do this
4. Getting my arms done (crossing my fingers to make this happen)

Stone Soup for Supper

Photobucket

Tomorrow I'm having beef stew for supper. I've got the beef, red potatoes, carrots & a little of everything from the spice cabinet in the crock pot ready to go. Yay for cooking!

I wanna be a rockstar! But I aint got what it takes...

Fake album cover time! I totally stole this meme from "Nothing to Show but Brand New Tattoo" because it's freaking awesome. And you can do it yourself too! Just use these links (or scroll ahead to mine):

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random - The first article title is the name of your band.

2. http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3 - The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.

3. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/ - The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

Now take your picture, add the band name and title to it, then post it.

Here's my first attempt: Long Trail Brewing Company presents their debut album! Eating Frozen Radio Dinners!

Album Cover 1


(Here's the original photo on flickr)

Photoshop meet Funny

These videos have to be some of the funniest things made for YouTube. And the best is Number 3 -- so You have to watch that one first. It's seriously one of the most amusing things I've seen. It had me in tears this morning.

These are photoshop tutorials. And they're fucking funny. Seriously.

Start with Number 3 -- Click here if the video below doesn't work (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWn0lxRNqos)



Then once that one has you hooked -- you can click here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_X5uR7VC4M) to watch video #2 (Tel, you'll love this one)

And the here for #3 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXeZ0s8DXZ0)

Library of Congress posting non-copyrighted images on flickr for all to view, use and enjoy. Free.

This is kinda really freaking awesome. The Library of congress is beginning to make its media public -- and not just public -- but easily accessible. They're uploading thousands of copyright free photos to flickr for all to view, search, use and enjoy. They've even made the original high resolution files of each available for download!

In their own words:

"Out of some 14 million prints, photographs and other visual materials at the Library of Congress, more than 3,000 photos from two of our most popular collections are being made available on our new Flickr page"

And not only is this generally awesome for all of us, but there is more to it. By allowing thousands of people to view these photos, they're allowing thousands people to pool their knowledge about them. What they have right now are some remarkable photos -- what they'll have after public contribution is much more. The locations will be identified -- the people will be identified -- back stories will be filled in. Each individual photo will be its own wiki. And these photos will be integrated into other uses where they previously would not have been available.

Basically, everything about this project is awesome. This is a huge step and I'm sure there will be more to follow. This is big.

I'm sitting here in my pajamas viewing hundreds of photos from the archives of the Library of Congress. Remarkable.

Read more about it here (http://www.loc.gov/blog/?p=233).

And visit the project on flickr here (http://www.flickr.com/commons).

And jump straight to the photos here (http://flickr.com/photos/library_of_congress).

And it all started with porn...

I forgot about this article I read a few days ago (http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/Movies/01/09/film.diablo.cody.ap/index.html). It's about the author of "Juno."

I saw Juno about 2 weeks ago with a massive group of (17) friends. I thought it was an exceptionally odd choice for a group movie, but it was actually quite good. In fact, everyone loved it. No wonder it's become a run away hit. I recommend it. As do critics:

"Reviews have been positive, with The Associated Press calling it "the kind of movie all indie comedies wish they could be: light and lovable, perhaps a bit too pleased with the cleverness of its dialogue, but a small charmer nonetheless.""

And then a few days ago I came across this article, which makes it so much more awesome. Apparently it is written by an ex-stripper who is now a sex blogger. And get this -- her manager found her whole surfing the internet for porn one night. And I learned this on CNN.com. Oh man, the awesomeness is too much. Which is why I had to share.

Consultation with the plastic surgeon -- I need 12,000 dollars, please.

I met with a plastic surgeon today. It was remarkably uncomfortable and embarrassing. I knew it would be, of course. Standing naked in front of two strangers while one of them pulls on your fat and tells you all the medical terms for your most embarrassing imperfections is just not that pleasant, you know? But I know what I want to do and I know how much it will cost.

Of course cost is the factor that limits me. I am seeking financing but I don't think I can be approved (have been turned down twice) and even if I am -- the monthly payments will be beyond what I can afford. They say money isn't everything -- but it kinda is, really.

Ideally, I would get my abdomen and arms done right now. I've no desire to touch my breasts and I'm not looking to be sculpted into a bikini worthy body. And my legs are still changing so no point in doing them yet. My priority is my arms. We discussed what would be done and I would get an extended procedure that would go slightly past my elbow and also take care of under my arm next to my breasts.

I'd like to get my abdomen done at that same time (as unrealistic as that might be). He discussed how he would do it and at this time I'm not going to get the muscles tightened. I want to have a baby eventually and I don't want to be messing that up. He will however get rid of the ungodly amount of extra skin and fix the fact that I have 3 "fat"/skin rolls even though I'm a freaking size medium. I'd like that. A lot. Not as much as I'd like my arms done, but a lot.

The total for both procedures (which could realistically be done at the same time with a recovery schedule that would work with my work vacation) is 10,800 dollars. They told me to go ahead and get a loan for at least 500 more to cover any financing fees and tests I might need. So 11,300 -- might as well get approved for 11,500 just incase. Insurance won't cover a lick of it -- I already knew that. 11,500 is beyond worth it -- thats like buying a used car -- except that it's buying a body -- which is way better.

If I get arms only (with an overnight hospital stay -- which I prefer) extended slightly longer than usual along the arm plus a little under the arm would be a total cost of 5,800 dollars. So like 6,300 - 6,500.

I want this. It looks like I can't have it right now -- but I know I WILL eventually. And I'm going to do everything possible to go ahead and at least do my arms. Financing probably won't work out -- but the Lord works in mysterious (sometimes aggravating) ways so we'll see what happens :) I'm applying for lots of medical loans to see if I can get anyone to approve me with an affordable monthly payment. As soon as I get the money, it's happening.

Update on Mom

Mom finally got to go home from the hospital today -- Thursday evening. She had a very serious heart attack around 2 AM on Friday morning. She passed out and couldn't wake my sister and finally after about an hour crawled to a phone and called my other sister. That sister called an ambulance.

The ambulance arrived and incompetent idiots thought they could make a diagnosis. They told her she had a virus. They didn't give her aspirin. They didn't give her oxygen. They didn't check her blood pressure. They didn't take her to the hospital. In fact, they told her she didn't need to go.

I'm going to take a break here to talk to all the women out there. Apparently no one in my family new this -- my coworkers didn't know this -- my friends didn't know this. A heart attack is not the same in women. It is harder to detect -- it's very different -- it can be mistaken for the flu -- and it doesn't have to hurt. Mom was in no pain at all -- she was just getting weaker by the moment.

Cindy thankfully drove her to the hospital (where she works) immediately anyway. She saved her life. Had they waited any longer, shed have died. They were able to put in a few stints without surgery and clean out her arteries. Hopefully thats all she will need. She had a pump pumping her heart for her but they were able to get her off that on Sunday. She got out of intensive care on Monday and finally left the hospital today, Thursday.

She's staying with my brother and his family while she recovers -- and HOPEFULLY she will sell her house and stay with them until she can catch a breath and get on her feet financially again.

Thank you all for the prayers and well wishes and support. My friends and coworkers have been so wonderfully supportive. I knew I have been building such a wonderful life for myself and surrounding myself with friends -- but I did not realize how many people really are there for me. I think to say it's touching would be trite -- I've no good word for it. But it means a lot to me.

Not good.

My mom just had a heart attack. I'm going to Birmingham.

Wait -- what are the rules on this shit?

I just accepted a date for this weekend. It feels a little odd being that I just broke up with my (now ex)boyfriend not even technically a week ago -- and I'm still upset about that -- but then I'm single now, right? Is there like a preliminary mourning period on this stuff?

I'm kinda excited about it...

I'll tell you what -- I told my sister in law this on Christmas -- losing that weight was the best damn investment I have and ever will make. Lifes much more fun when you're hot. And I know that's a given -- but seriously -- lots more fun.

I have come to the conclusion...

Someone has stolen my DVD player remote control. I've searched everywhere for it. I've moved all the furniture. I've cleaned under all the shelves. I even cleaned under the refridgerator.** It is not here. If you have any information about its whereabouts, please email me.

I've also decided that it would be a very evil passive-aggressive revenge tactic to take someone's remote control. Especially if it's one they won't miss right away. Then they'll spend days searching for it. They'll ransack their entire house and be driven crazy and they'll never find it. How evil is that? It's a lot evil -- that's what it is.

Footnotes: **Under the fridge appears to be Jack's treasure chest. I was not aware so much could possibly be under there. There were cat toys, bottle caps, freshness seals, and an ungodly amount of candy. Bon bons, star busts, skittles, easter candy, valentines candy, blow pops and the end of a bread stick. I give Jack the freshness seals from my milk-cartons. He loves them. And I've never actually questioned where they all go. Now I know. But there was no remote control :(

I resolve...

Ok, I don't do New Years Resolutions. Never do really -- I make wishes for what I'd like to happen during the year -- but they're not usually even things I can make happen so it's definitely not something I'm "resolving" to do. But I'm feeling like I've got one for 2008. And if I don't resolve to do it -- I won't.

I resolve to continue running.

And if it doesn't stick, I resolve to at least really give it a shot. I'm not allowed to quit until I can run a mile in 14 minutes. It'll take me a bit to work back up to a mile after a month off and 14 minutes will be an improvement of just over a minute over what I was up to.

I don't enjoy running. I think it sucks a lot. I'm told that will change when I get up around 2 miles. Thats a ways off. Again: I don't like running. But I like that I run. I feel good about it. And after I catch my breath, I'm proud of myself. But it's very hard for me -- after about a half, I'm ready to stop and after .7, I'm dying. Kyle really had o push me to finish every time. And I won't have Kyle pushing me this time. It'll just be me. But that will only make me more proud of myself.

So I don't know that it will stick -- I don't expect it to -- but I'm putting the requirement on it that I can't stop until I've really tried. I'm going to scope out a few bike paths around where I live as possible locations and I shall begin as soon as I get my running shoes back. In fact I'm requiring that I have to go for a run within 3 days of whenever I get them back. This I resolve.




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