Cooking in an apartment

I'm still on the quest for a lean cut of beef I can cook well in my apartment. I can cook in a crock-pot if I had one. And I've cooked a few different thick cuts wrapped in a foil bag with lots of liquid to duplicate the crock-pot effect. It comes out great. But I want something like a steak. The butcher gave me some small cuts and told me how to cook them on the stove -- but they didn't come out well. Too tough -- like a steak you'd get at Waffle House or something.

Tonight I'm giving one more stove try before I give up and buy a broiler pan and try that method. I saw a chef make it on Jay Leno last week -- skirt steak. It's really skinny and he cooked it in a skillet -- not because he didn't have another option, but because he's a chef and he chose to cook it that way. We'll see how it turns out.

Any recommendations? How about a george forman grill? Are those just a gimmick? How hard are they to clean? Rachel Ray has a grill thing in her kitchen -- what's that? I want a way to cook good lean meat. In this case: steak, but also chicken of course. Something GOOD, and reasonably easy to clean would be nice. I've got counter space.

Gregory Maguire’s Lost

I just finished this book (quite literally – 5 minutes ago). Steph loaned it to me along with another of his books since I find myself with so much time at work which could be allotted to reading if I so chose.

My impressions? Hmm. I’m not sure. Half the books sucked – and half of it didn’t. It begins with a story which, while interesting enough, suddenly climaxes in 1 page and is over. Then there’s tons of empty space of trying to develop a seemingly unconnected story up. The first 200 pages or so weren’t winning me over. In fact, had I not been sitting here at work, I might have given up. But after that – I found myself glued to it. I wanted to know what happened next – I wanted to know why the characters were doing what they did and I wanted to know what happened next. The last 120 or so pages were great.

But now I’m done and the books just done. It’s just done. With hardly any answers about the characters that remain. So was she hoping for John or Irv? And were John and Allegra together or not? WHAT HAPPENED WITH HER AND JOHN? It’s kinda infuriating. The book climaxed in a dramatic scene and then it’s over. Just over. Well, dammit – what happened after that? WHAT HAPPENED WITH HER AND JOHN?

This is going to bug me for a long time. And then I’ll drop it because I’ve no choice but to drop it. I don’t get to know. Do I recommend this book? I want you to read it and then tell me what you think happens with her and John – cause dammit, I wanna know.

Reading this book was like watching a movie on basic cable at 3am. The movie sucks and you’d never choose to watch it – but it’s this or QVC and you can’t sleep. And even though the movie isn’t all that great, you end up watching it and getting into it and then the cable cuts out and you don’t get to know how it ends.

It feels kinda like that. Like no it wasn’t that great but DAMMIT WHAT HAPPENED WITH HER AND JOHN?

Only 11.5 more hours before my shift is over.

My glasses came today! I love them. I had started to get worried because I read horrible things written by opticians about why you should not order glasses online. I was so worried that I had a dream the other night that I got them and they were all messed up -- everything looked pixilated through them. Which would never happen in real life, but it was a dream so you can't be too picky.

They're a perfect fit and I can see through them perfectly. So there was nothing to worry about :) I ordered from and I'd order from them again. Their customer service was great, fast shipping, and great product at a even better price. Now I've got to send off my current frames for new lenses.

These are going to take some getting used to though. The lenses are smaller, so I've got to get used to that -- also just the look of them. They're so different - I've never had such a bold pair. I still like my old ones better -- they're a nicer pair -- but these will be my fun casual pair. I've never had 2 pairs of glasses before -- now they really are like more of an accessory :) I'll post a pic when I get my camera back.

Oh and I have poison ivy on my hand. From frisbee golf. That's how bad I am -- I had to keep fishing my frisbee out of the woods and now I have poison ivy. Nice. Right now it's not bad -- right now it's normal. And I hope it stays this way. Though I'm HIGHLY allergic to poison ivy -- at least I used to be -- and it was never just normal. It was a few spots and then the next day half my body would be swollen and the ER would had to give me steroid shots and I'd look horrible for abouta week. Here's hoping I've grown out of that. Cause there's a chance I have -- right? I mean this might not get any worse -- right? RIGHT? At least I have epipens if I can't breathe and hey, it might be ok -- right?

Questions questions

Hmmm. To get to my apartment, you get off memorial just past downtown, turn right at the 2 bars and the mental health place -- pass Hunters Ridge -- thats where all the sex offenders live according to all the notices I get in my mail box. I live right across from the gas station -- if you hit the gay night club, you went to far.

So here's my dilemma -- it's GORGEOUS weather outside. But it's night. So -- is it too careless to go for a jog? What's the safety factor here? Should I just do sit ups instead? I kinda want to go jog.

Because when you hurt my feelings, I automatically have the right to post about it on my blog.

Alternate title: White men are fucking morons.

The following is an actual IM conversation I had tonight (names have been changed to protect the stupid white american male consensus):

12:21:27 AM person: you are.. not ideal for me, I'm still one of those white assholes you like to rant about :)
12:21:36 AM karen: you all are
12:21:43 AM karen: which is why a great chick like me is single
12:21:46 AM person: but weight is [only] one component
12:22:06 AM person: although a big one.. which is why I'm trying to get my weight under control


12:22:55 AM person: you *are* attractive
12:23:00 AM karen: and too fat for you
12:23:03 AM karen: :-p
12:23:04 AM person: not ideal


12:24:45 AM person: to be honest.. you're fatter than I would prefer.. and you're making excellent progress on it, make no mistake about it

Now there's going to be 2 general reactions you'll have to this. One (most likely the girls) will respond that he's an asshole. Or two (most likely the men), will respond that he's just being honest and that's the way life is. I should eat it because I am fat and it's not his fault.

Well, I do eat it. I eat it every minute of every single day. I eat it every time I'm in public and people might be looking at me (wether they really are or not is irrelevant). I eat it every time I force myself to stay where I am rather than run home and get under the covers where I'm safe. I eat it every time I feel the tingle in my neck and the rush of emotions that foretell an anxiety attack in progress.

It's things like this that make me wish suicide wasn't a horrible sin and totally wrong and hurtful to everyone I know. It's things like this that make me seem like I'm always despairing. Because the fact is that as much as I have to tell myself that I look fine -- that they're not looking at me -- they're not making fun of me -- I'm not disgusting -- the FACT is that I'm fat. When people see me -- they don't see me -- they don't see karen -- they see a fat chick. Period. No matter how many people try to make me believe its not true -- it is true. Period.

And I had a great day today. I felt good about myself today. I did well on the test I've been freaking out about. I played frisbee golf and fed the duckies. I laid by the pond and watched the turtles pop up for breath. I paid my bills and I went to dancing lessons! And I had dinner with new people that I actually liked. And I felt like I looked great. But what does it come down to? I'm "not ideal."

So why can't anyone understand how after losing over a hundred pounds, I still feel like this? What's the part you don't get? Who gives a shit that I lost a hundred pounds -- no one sees that. They just see the pounds I still have. They just see another fat chick. And no matter what I do -- I just can't overcome that. It always crops up -- even after people have gotten to know me.

Years of knowing someone -- only to find hes always had a problem with my weight. A great evening hanging out and talking and laughing -- and I'm still the fat chick. -- but hey -- you're making progress!

Bullshit. This is all bull shit. I wanna move to Europe where I'll have the cute accent and where they can see past your exterior because they think american super models are disgusting and there's nothing wrong with someone my size. I want to curl up in bed with the cat and the air conditioning where I'm comfortable and safe. I want to go ahead and give up because I'll never get what I want in life.

And I thought I looked so excellent today. Seriously.

At least Grey's Anatomy comes on tomorrow.

Frisbee golf amateur

I really suck at frisbee golf. Really bad. I'm a little better than I was when I first started -- now it takes me 5 throws to make a par 3 instead of 7. I need to find someone whos actually good at it to teach me a bit and help me improve. The problem is that I don't know where to find someone like that. The people who play frisbee golf aren't the students -- the students think it's stupid. I just do it for the exercise. Anyone wanna teach me a few tips? I don't get distance at all. I see people who can throw it at least three times as far as I can, easy. Mine are more like tosses -- it takes me 4 throws just to get in range of the basket! Any ideas?


I'm treating myself to a years subscription of Martha Stewart Living. I want to be Martha Stewart. I want a gorgeous house with a huge yard and gardens that I can decorate to hell and back for any random reason. And then I'd have all my snazzy friends over for tea parties centered and themed around some obscure minute detail. And lord at that crafts I could do. Crafts crafts and more crafts. Not just a studio -- but lots of studios and dedicated craft rooms. And unlimited supplies and funding and tools. And a whole garage of power tools ready for any whim I might have. And maids and cooks. And making a new kind of wreath every week from the wonderful plants in my gardens. And the decorations! Oh I'd be so awesome. If I ever become a rich mans wife, I wanna stay at home and pretend to be his personal Martha Stewart -- he better be detail-oriented.

Today I bought pumpkins. I love pumpkins. I got a big one, 5 little ones, 5 random awesomely cool gourds, and three pieces of dried indian corn. I arranged it all in the center of my table in this awesome bamboo basket/tray (it's a basket but it's round and very shallow -- like a tray) that my mom gave me. And then I went in my kitchen and grabbed the potatoes and put them in there -- and the apples too. It looks like a huge cornucopia over flowing with all sorts of autumn goodness. It makes me very happy.

I also hung a Halloween sign outside my apartment door. I mean halloweens only a little over a month away...

And yes, I'm going to buy even more pumpkins and carve them too. I'm going to drop into a home improvement store and pick up the proper tools. Namely, a key-hole saw. I'm also going to get some wood-carving tools. Pumpkins are less than 3 bucks at the store. I can buy one every time I'm in there -- and carve them all up in gorgeous baroque patterns and any manner of things derived from Martha Stewart's October issue. I'll probably wait to start the carvings until I get my camera back though...


Wednesday morning I have a very difficult test that I'm already freaking out about.

Wednesday evening I'm going to private dance lessons. Then I'm cooking enchilladas for company after said dancing. Didn't see that coming, did ya ;) I'm excited.

The new baby nephew

The good news: I took TONS of picture of the new baby. Pictures of me holding the new baby (I look so skinny! I have pictures of the first time I held Cole and I was twice the size – well, technically I was pretty close to twice the size. I might have to get the picture printed on that merit alone), pictures of the momma and the baby – my momma and the baby – more of just the baby… you get the picture.

The bad news: I left the camera at the hospital in Birmingham.

Oh well. My newest nephew, Cade, was born September 22 at around 11am. I’m told the birth went quickly and yet there was lots and lots of pain – problems with the pain meds – and my sister-in-law swears to god that this is the LAST. He was born with the cord around his neck so he had to go to the NICU to have it cut away and now he’s doing great. He was born 9 lbs, 22 inches (still shorter than Cole was) and he is the calmest quietest baby anyone has ever seen. He doesn’t cry – He just kinda coos and might do a quiet eh-eh-eh before shushing again. Hes alert and just stares at you with cute little eyes.

I swear, he’s ADORABLE. I got to hold him lots. When Cole was born, he has to stay in the hospital for weeks and it was weeks before his own mother could even pick him up. So this is a new experience for the parents and us bystanders as well. He’s staying in the room with his momma and quietly cooing his little heart out. Heidi is doing great. She’s in pain but she’s handling it. And shes so great with the little one! She doesn’t look stressed at all – she just looks like a perfect natural. And shes loving every minute of it.

My brother is working his butt off. The baby was supposed to arrive Monday, so this weekend was packed out with things scheduled so everything would be done just in time for the new baby to come. He was on call last night and they were super busy so I didn’t even get to see him while I was down there. Heidi says hes just loving the new baby – and even after being on call, he wouldn’t lay down to catch any sleep before his next shift because he couldn’t just lay there with his precious new child in the same room LOL

Cole is THE big brother. Hes wearing a shirt that says so. In fact, that shirt had to be washed last night so he could wear it again today. He is smitten. Last night he didn’t want to leave because he was worried about leaving behind his little brother. And he wants to hold him constantly – if anyone else gets to hold him, Cole (who is 5, BTW) has to be touching and kissing him. It’s super sweet.

Cade doesn’t look like hes just a day old. Not at all – he looks like he’s been out for a good while. Hes got loads of hair, great skin color – and my, hes a robust little thing. He’s got wide shoulders and is anything but lanky – he’s going to be a strong little boy – hes got the football player frame. I can’t believe I might not make it home again till November! I’m gonna miss it all!

And my lord – I’ve never touched anything as soft as a newborn baby’s hair. There isn’t even anything I can compare it to.

Happy Birthday!

My newest littlest nephew is going to be born tomorrow! My sister-in-law is being induced tonight. So congrats to my brother on his second child -- which is sure to be 7 feet tall and a cutie.

I'm going to run to Bham tomorrow after class to see everybody and congratulate them and meet the new baby then run back here for work on Saturday. Wish me safe driving -- hopefully I'll snap a few pics of the new family member to post!

If I promise to be really sweet, will you rub my feet?

The title sentence is exactly why I need a lover right now. I'd ask him oh-so-sweetly to please give me a foot rub. I never was one to ever get why women love foot rubs so much -- I never wanted someone rubbing my FEET. Of course I never was one to wear high-heels either. I get it now.

Yes you read that correctly, Karen wears heels now. It's all part of this weird super-hot feminization thing I've got going on. The smaller I get, the sexier I get. When I was big, I couldn't be dainty and sensitive -- too many people made fun of me enough as it was. Now that I'm shrinking, I'm carrying pretty purses, and wearing pink delicate fabrics, and lipstick... and patent leather high-heeled boots. They're gonna be the big thing this fall, you know.

So far I've been avoiding stepping on the cat with them. Tonight I took the big step - I wore high-heels in public... for the first and longest time ever. And I've got a few things to say about it.

First, how the fuck are you supposed to go down stairs when you can't bend your ankle at all? I'm sure there's some awesomely girly trick to it -- do share. I tried the side step thing -- nope. It seems to me that you REALLY need your ankles to bend on stairs. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Second, no one told me you had to be in shape to wear these things. I'm by no means in shape. And 3 inch heels seem to take an awful lot of energy. Seriously -- I was getting hot walking around the mall in them. They take so much more energy to walk in.

Third, if yall thought I walked slow before -- imagine how slow I walk when I feel like an obese flamingo trying to march. I had to talk on my cellphone just so I didn't feel retarded.

Fourth -- OH MY GOD. I look fucking hot in these things. I was wearing khakis, a tank, and a hoodie -- and I swear my legs have never looked sexier. No wonder women put up with this shit -- anything that makes your legs, ass, entire posture look THIS GREAT is worth it. Has to be. I'll get used to it -- right?

Fifth, I went to look for pumpkins and Halloween decorations -- I ended up buying skirts, shoes, and a frisbee. And I honestly don't know if I ended up buying the shoes because trying on shoes meant taking the boots off or if I would have bought them anyway. Man they were a total steal though -- and they're heels -- though more of a casual everyday heel.

Sixth, a older (probably 40ish) man totally looked me up and down and flirted to hell and back with me! He saw me walking across the parking lot to my gorgeous baby Beetle and rushed over to ask me how I was and talk about the weather -- while smiling the biggest smile and stealing glances at my breasts and hooker boots LOL It was fun. And another older black guy (we've been over the black guy attraction I seem to emit that has no effect on white men) watched my ass as I walked for way way way too long. Again, fun.

Seventh -- the season premiere of Grey's Anatomy is tomorrow. I CANT WAIT. Don't call me tomorrow night -- I won't answer.

Jealousy is a very bad sin.

You know, I'm really very jealous of the people who live on Oprah's "Angel Lane." You know -- the neighborhood that Oprah built in Houston Texas for the hurricane Katrina victims. 65 houses. 65 brand new houses completely furnished and outfitted with all new furnishing and accessories --by professional designers -- and no rent or mortgages. They've been visited by every celebrity that ever pretended to care. Oprah's giving then something new every time I see the damn show. Today Matthew McConaughey built them a play ground. Jon Bon freaking Jovi just showed up to open Bon Jovi Blvd (complete with stocked fridges, BTW) -- and to give all the residents of the neighborhood free cell phones and a years free cell service compliments of Verizon. Eva Longorias coming on next -- I bet she gives all the little kids their own ponies.

I'll tell you what: Being stuck in a hell hole after a hurricane sinks your entire city has never looked so good. I'll camp out on my roof and wave at helicopters for a few days for that.

God forgive me - I know, I'm an idiot -- they went through a lot of crap... let me repeat that to myself for a long time. A real long time. I need to go pray or something.

PS: How old is Jon Bon Jovi? He looks pretty damn good for however old he is.

A loss of dreams.

I feel very shitty right now. And confused. Confused because I feel so shitty. And I have to ask myself -- how much of how I feel is medication-related? How much of it is just because of how my brain is wired -- how much of it could be cured with the right pill? And if it could just magically go away with a pill -- does that make it false? What's real and what's not? Are my feelings really my feelings? It's a very confusing matter.

I just want to -- cry -- but not even cry -- just to mourn what is lost -- to scream and let everyone know how screwed I am, as if their pity or assurances actually mattered. But I've lost nothing. Can't lose something you never had -- and yet there is a feeling of loss there. A hole that won't be filled. Something you just live with -- but I'm tired of living with it.

And it's 7:05 and I just CAN'T SLEEP. And how much of it is that? How much better will I feel after I've slept? Get some sleep, go to class, wash clothes, vacuum, play with the cat -- then I'll feel better, right? So does that mean that how I feel at this moment -- shitty -- isn't legit? How do I make it better?

Months and it's no better. Months and it's still like this. And no one understands -- and why should they? I'm glad it's all gone and only left to memory -- less to dwell on and lose myself in. Just memory and a clock. That's all that remains. And pain that an Advil won't fix.


A question of Morals & Money

Unannounced to me, a new Tickle-Me-Elmo has been released. This one is a little robot thingy that rolls around and slaps the floor while laughing and then stands on its own two feet. Snazzy. And good god -- look how much the things are going for on eBay! So here's the question -- do I do nothing, or...

Do I grab some money out of savings, buy 3 of the things and hock them on eBay later? Yes, I'm totally serious. I don't have money to waste on a stupid toy -- but if I can turn a profit now or down the road -- I've got money for that. And I've got time to run around town tomorrow to find some. But what if this is all just hype -- the thing just came out today -- why are they already being bid on hundreds of times on eBay? Will there be a huge shortage near christmas where I can triple my investment? Or will I be stuck with three laughing and way-over-priced Elmos?

What to do, what to do...

Ps, look at this creepy-ass picture of elmo. He looks like he's doing a real slow head turn or something. Like he has no neck so he has to kinda lean back to turn his head as his eyes dart in your direction. There's no way that thing would sleep in the same room as me. Period. You only think I'm joking.


I would like to play softball. I used to be damn good at softball. Where can I join like a league just for fun? I don't think I'm good enough to play on a REAL team - especially since I haven't played in years -- but I wouldn't mind joining up with some people that just play for fun on the weekends or something. Any ideas? Maybe I should go to some batting cages first? Do I have to buy my own bat for that?

Edit: Damn, I missed Fall registration by like 2 weeks. The good news is that you don't have to be good -- you just have to pay 370 bucks. And the games are only on weekday nights -- which would totally fit in my schedule perfectly -- but I'm too late! I'm gonna have to keep this in mind for Spring.

The claw question: answered.

So it's time to clip my cats claws. And we all know that this is right up there with baths as far as their preferences go. So I sneak the clippers in my pocket and pick him up. I sit in the floor with him and I have to wonder -- front or back first? Usually by the time I get the back, he's ready to kill me -- so maybe I should start at the back this time? Is there a cat claw clipping standard here? But I just went with the flow and did what I always do -- front claws first. Left front -- getting annoyed -- Right front -- now he's pissed. See and now we're at that point where hes wailing bloody murder and gnawing on my arm. So I grab his back paw and try to get this over with and he hisses. Oh, this is going down hill. Then -- he growls and slaps me! Hard.

And I was really happy I had already clipped the front claws.

Halloween Preparations

I'm going to get Jack some orange Soft Paws so he can be wearing them in October. And...

I'M GONNA BE A SEXY WITCH! Yes, my now XL and therefore regular sized and millions of options ass is going to be one sexy ass witch for Halloween. Do I care that I haven't had plans on Halloween for years? Fuck no. I'm so ordering a full on sexy witch costume.

I'm gonna be a sexy witch and my witch cats gonna have ORANGE claws because we go all out for holidays at Karens house.

I havn't picked out the costume yet, but I've already found the place I'm ordering my black and orange striped tights from LOL And I've got my sexy black patent-leather boots already! You know, on the Today show, they told me that these are going to be all the rage this fall.

Old Friend's response to seeing my smaller ass:

"WOW OH MY GOOOOD You look so different (good different)! Good for you! That is awesome, though a little creeepy. It is like I know you but who are you....??????????? You really, really do look great. I hope ***** eats crow when he looks at your pictures."

I'm doing fine, thanks.

Got a out of the blue call today. It was from an old friend -- one I rudely dropped/abandoned because the friendship was far too one sided. Havn't talked to her in about 2 years. And rather than just going on about her problems which was the old way -- she was super interested in what I had been up to -- lots of questions about me and how I've been. It was nice. And so guess how the conversation went?
"What have I been up to? Well, I still live in Huntsville -- finally got my own place & a cat. Lost a hundred an twenty pounds. Oh yeah -- I finally got a Beetle too. I work at the police department -- it's pretty cool."
LOL -- how good do I sound like I'm doing? I was quite tickled that I only had good things to say about myself. That rocks. I've made a lot of changes in the past year or so -- a LOT. And they're all great. That feels nice :)

And you know I was telling her that and she was super excited for me -- even though I think she had this weird thing where she never saw me as hugely fat. And she asked me if I had any big plans to do something that I couldn't do before. And yes, I do -- but I didn't immediately fess that up -- I asked her what she meant. And she recalled the time that we went to 6-flags long ago and I didn't ride anything (because I was too big) -- she said she knew that that had bothered me. Heh. I didn't know she noticed, mush less had perceived my discomfort/shame/sadness about it. And isn't it funny -- that that's the exact thing I want to do?

I've mentioned it here before. That I want to go to a theme park with a ton of roller coasters because I never could ride them when I was "little." This is what I've longed for the most since before I had the surgery - I set that as something I wanted to do -- a goal. Unfortunately, I planned to do it with a dear friend and attached it to them. And while that has fallen through, I still owe it to myself to go have a ball. I don't know what park I want to go to -- this is a big thing for me so I'm willing to splurge and go anywhere in the US. Any suggestions? Any of my blog readers want to join me?

Anyway, it was weird talking to her -- and especially weird when I see myself as being in a bad place -- but that I'm really not. I've come so far. And my life doesn't suck anymore. Interesting.

We'll see if I hear from her again. I told her I was never in Bham (the truth) so she'd have to come to Huntsville -- she immediatly replied "how about next weekend!?" So I guess we'll see?

New Glasses

While I await arrival of my new glasses, here they are. This picture shows my current frames (top) and my new ones (bottom). (I've included the brand/skew # Of the frames incase you just love them so much you have to get your own.

Though that picture shows my current frames in black -- Mine are cranberry red. My current glasses are still the nicer pair and will probably be my main pair. The new ones don't look it in this picture -- but they're very bold and dark (especially compared to my current ones which are only half framed). They've got that stylish geeky/quirky vibe for sure! And I ordered them in black frames (which look great with my eye brows) lined with pink. The inside of the frames is all pink -- so even though they're bold and geeky, they've got the ultra-stylish girly shape -- and of course the pink softens them and makes them very feminine.

I can't wait till they get here! I'll post a picture of me wearing them when they do.

Choosing the frames was simple. I tried on many of the hundreds of pairs they had and ended up with 5 in my "box" (they give it to you to carry around all your "possibilities" for comparison). When I looked closer, I noticed that two of the 5 pairs were actually the same frames (this one) just in different colors. That sealed it. I picked them twice independently. And the color was no question. I only had the second pair because they looked so good on me -- I just hated the color. LOL

Proud of Myself

Today I got to pay a lot of money for things I didn't expect to have to pay. Don't you LOVE when that happens? When you end up paying a ton of money for something that you had nothing to do with, certainly don't want to pay for, but have absolutely no choice? Cause I love it. Especially when it costs me 250 dollars that should be payed back to me -- but I already know it won't. YAY!

And for some reason -- well no, I know the reason. Because I was distressed about putting out a lot of money, I thought about other expenses on the horizon -- glasses. The lenses in my current pair have chipped across the top -- meaning that eventually, the right ones gonna "pop out." Seeing as this is my only pair of glasses, and that I can't get along without them -- that would be bad. I've been meaning to get new lenses put in them. And hey -- why not go ahead and look into that? So I went to Lens Crafters.

Turns out -- my already crappy insurance doesn't cover vision. At all. But this is something I really need, so I just have to eat it. It was 62 dollars just to get my eye exam and prescription. Ouch. Then for lenses -- they were going to START at 240. Double ouch. Painful. And that's just to get lenses in the frames I already have. We aren't talking about new glasses here -- just lenses. 300 bucks (eye exam + lenses). Ow. And Really, I need to have 2 pairs of glasses -- everyone should have a back-up pair -- plus glasses are so freakin snazzy and stylish. So I shopped around for some frames that I like. Their frames started at 130 -- but I found a pair I liked for 150 -- though you have to add lenses to that -- that START at 240 (remember?) and now you're looking at 400 bucks. Don't forget to add the 300 for the lenses for the current pair & the exam. 700 bucks. Seven. Hundred. Dollars.

Obviously, I couldn't afford to pay for them. I mean I have the money in savings -- but I have to transfer it before I can spend it. So I paid for the eye exam and took all the info for the glasses I wanted and left my order "open." Then I came home to sulk about the unexpected expenses totaling nearly a thousand dollars in just ONE FREAKING DAY.

Well, I decided to just look up the glasses I chose to post a picture of -- that lead to froogling them and finding them all over the web for 71 dollars (NOT 150). So I decided that if I get them, I'd order them online then have the lenses put in and save some money. But wait -- I can go ahead and order them with my prescription -- how much would that cost? Well, friends, I got lenses better than the ones I was going to get at Lens Crafters + the scratch resistence + the glare resistense + 100% UV protection -- for 130! That means the glasses and lenses are 200! That's cheaper than I was going to pay just to get lenses for my old ones! So Hell yeah I went ahead and ordered them -- I can't wait till they get here!

My old glasses, you ask? Well check this out -- When my new glasses get here, I'll be able to part with my current glasses (which obviously, I need so anywhere I got them would have to do them in 1 hour while I wait because I can't drive). So this means that I can mail off my current pair and have the same shiny new lenses put in them that will be in my new pair! I'm so excited! So over all I'll be spending 300 to get my current glasses saved from breakage and a brand new pair -- and that's impressive considering insurance isn't paying a penny of it. Funny, I could actually have surgery and a 12 day hospital stay and pay less out of pocket than I'm paying for some freakin' glasses. What the hell is that?


Oh, that reminds me. Today in class, I heard a guy actually say "w" "t" "f" behind the teachers back. First -- like theres anyone in the room who doesn't know what WTF mean -- and SECOND who the fuck says "W" "T" "F" -- who says the letters? Does he also say "L" "O" "L" instead of laughing? What a goober. In fact, goober and geek and lame are all too good for this freak. Who the hell says that? Say it outloud to hear how idiotic it sounds -- Don't just read the letters -- say them out loud. I've never heard them spoken -- it's far worse than you'd imagine.


In other news, I recieved my first Assembly program (Assembly the old stupid painful programming language). We went over a "hello world" program in class. ALL TWO PAGES OF IT. I freaked out. No seriously, I freaked out. I almost had an anxiety attack right there in class. I'm not exagerrating -- I almost had to leave the room. That's how freaking scary the "hello world" program looked. And now I'm going to have to write a much more complex program. In assembly. I'm scared.


Also, I got my power bill today. It actually went down even though I've been running the AC like i've got Frosty in the kitchen. How freaking awesome. I can totally get a penguin on these prices. I've had it on 65 degrees at night -- A penguin would be all over that shit.

He shall look like this:

And I shall call him Beeker.

Blah blah blah... blah blah

I stayed up all night writing a computer program. Literally, I didn't even think about going to bed until 7AM. I got it pretty much done -- there was 1 quirk and I didn't implement one of the 7 required -- but whatever, I did it -- on time no less. So I go to class and try to turn it in -- and find out it's not due till Thursday. Dammit. I stayed up past sunrise for this thing. Oh well -- feels good to have it done.

I've got a test on Friday and have no earthly idea how on earth I'll pass. Pray for me.

Oh and Third Day's new Christmas CD is available for Pre-Order now. I'm not going to pre order it -- I figure I'll just buy it when it shows up in stores. They have some combo deals available with a shirt and the CD -- which I would SO BUY -- except that it has the last CD with it. We all already own the last CD so I'm not going to buy it again. They also have a christmas ornament. I think I'm gonna buy one for me and one for my mom - of course after shipping, that will be over 20 bucks and that hurts -- so I'll have to think about it... real hard. But I'm definitely getting the CD when it comes out. And I'm going to listen to it while I put up my tree! And it's going to AWESOME.

How cute is Mac in his scarf? Mark -- you should have snagged a scarf too!

My mouth is hanging open.

Tíne Chnámh
Originally uploaded by Mac Suibhne.

I am in absolute awe of this mans Stained Glass. Look at this piece -- the subtle engraving in the clear glass -- it's just like the cherry on top - - actually no -- its even better and more detailicious than a cherry on top -- this is the perfectly placed chocolate curl.

Look though his Stained Glass photo set! It's all so gorgeous -- the solder lines, the colors -- the engraving details! And the swirls in the glass. Does this man use a glass saw -- because if he cuts those curves by hand than I really just in shock.

I've fallen in love with him just looking through his flickr. Marry me, oh stained-glass god.

Edit: After looking closer, I've decided he HAS to be using a saw. Some of those cuts are simply impossible otherwise -- unless he's overkilling on the grinder -- or unless he really is the stained glass god. Man -- I've GOT to get a glass saw someday -- I could be so awesome.

The only one I didn't want to be.

I just took a "what seaseme-street character are you test." I know it's lame that I took it and even worse that I'm posting about it -- but I'm at work and don't get off for another 8 hours -- so give me a break.

Guess who I am? BERT. The one character that no one likes -- the one I didn't want to be! UGH!

You scored 79% Organization, 50% abstract, and 33% extroverted!

"You are both introverted. Bert can be grumpy and doesn't get along well with most other folks. Often he gets frustrated by their ignorance. For whatever reason you are uncomfortable in social settings. You may have one or two people that you are close with. You'd rather do things by yourself and you dislike working in groups where things are always so inefficient."

Why couldn't I have been Snuffleupagus? Or Oscar -- more people like Oscar than like Bert!

New Phone?

I am in need of a new cell phone. Needs to be Verizon compatible. Can you buy these anywhere (at a decent price) besides Verizon without buying a plan too? I don't want a damn plan -- I have a plan. My battery is messed up -- won't hold a charge. Time for a new phone. This one is a LG -- I don't have a problem with LG -- I've had like 3 LG phones but I hold no loyalty to them. The last phone I really loved (3 phones ago) was a Motorola -- everyone bad mouths those though. Need advice -- where can I get a steal on a good Verizon phone?

Is Apple ever really going to make a phone? Cause if I buy a phone and then the next week Apple finally unveils one -- I'm gonna be pissed.

Edit: I could go with eBay. I'll get a better deal there than I would in a Verizon store. Any recommendations on phones? My only requirements are that it have a color screen, external LCD (if it's a clam), speaker phone and the normal stuff that every phone has. Battery life is important to me. I don't use it for email or web surfing -- just a standard phone. I'm thinking I might want a camera phone so I could post pics here but don't most camera phones suck? Any insight or recommendations are more than welcome...

Note to self:

When testing your stained-glass packaging skills, it's not a good idea to apply pressure until you hear a crack. While this does let you know the tolerance of the packaging, as you predicted -- you probably should think such things through a little further.

Hmmm. So. Am I obligated to inform the buyer ahead of time that I'm substituting a different cross than the one they bought? This one has less blue -- but hey -- it's not broken, and if you ask me -- that means that this new one is way better.

Would anyone like a cracked stained glass cross thats made from antique glass salvaged from a church in Birmingham? The cracks not noticeable -- really the buyer might not have even noticed it -- but I'd have felt bad. You pay shipping and it's yours...

Dear Scrubbing Bubbles People

Your new product with a "New Fresh Clean Scent!" smells neither fresh nor clean. As someone who commonly scrubs her bath and toilet at 3 am -- whos solution to everything is "pour bleach on it!" -- Who wipes up tiny spills with clorox wipes -- and who burns herself on the stove because she felt the need to wipe up that little spill while shes still cooking -- because the metal should be SHINEY -- I think I can handle a little chemicals.

Last time I cleaned my shower, I just dumped bleach in it and scrubbed it all with a scrubbing brush -- then I did that again with Orange Clean super degreaser because a professional maid told me that thats how they clean showers -- then I wiped it all down with more bleach. I almost passed out. So this go around, I decided I could get it MORE clean if I bought something made specifically for the job. And the bubbles on the bottle of your product were cute. I chose the "fresh clean" scent because I think a bathroom should smell fresh and clean. As I said, your product smells neither fresh nor clean. In fact, I would classify it as "rancid" -- the smell actually made me want to vomit. And I already cleaned the toilet, dammit. I'd rather pass out from chlorine gas than throw up from Scrubbing Bubbles. Passing out from harsh chemicals and being sent to the ER for scrubbing your floor at 3AM says "I have OCD and my apartment is super clean." Passing out from Scrubbing Bubbles with a new fresh clean scent says "pansy" & "moron."

I would like a refund. I'm going back to bleach & more bleach. The tub was shinier when I used that anyway. Oh -- and I don't like the "no scrubbing" idea. You want me to spray this rancid product all over my shower -- where I am frequestly naked -- and then just rinse it off? Um no. Fuck you, Scrubbing Bubbles people -- your product sucks.

I <3 Publix

For the non-southern among you, Publix is a grocery store. When I lived on the UAH campus, I had to grocery shop at Walmart or Target because there weren't any grocery stores near campus. Now that I've moved over here though, I've got lots of grocery stores to choose from. Early on, I started hitting up Publix. I've been told Publix is more expensive than other stores -- and I guess that might be true -- because it a much more up-scale grocery store -- but they also have tons of awesome specials and BOGOs (Buy one get ones) every week. So I think it's not that much more -- but even if someone proved to me that it was more expensive, I'd still shop there.

First, the staff are always super helpful and in a great mood -- even the cashiers! Every time I go in there I end up having a conversation with at least one employee -- if not 2 or 3. I asked one of the cashiers about it and she said she really does love working there because the management is awesome. And from what I've seen, she had to be telling the truth. I've already mentioned their great specials and sales.

They also have great quality food. I will not buy meat anywhere else now. Even if I were to do my bulk shopping at another store, I'd make a special trip to Publix to get my meat. You can really taste and see the difference. It cooks up gorgeously -- seriously, and I'm not a cook or a conissure but even I can tell the difference. And they have a full on butcher. Today I saw a woman asking for some steaks cut special and he pulled out a whole new -- whatever you call half a cow ;) I heard her say how he didn't have to get out a whole new thing just for her! But he was so awesome he was like -- no no no don't worry about it -- it's not trouble! All their employees are like this. And they always have samples -- even today on a Wednesday they had samples. They sample different dinner options and meats and spices and I've ended up purchasing and making lots of new dishes as a result of this. They teach you how to cook it and everything. I've literally gone in there and said ok i want to have some kind of pork but I don't really know how to cook pork -- I'm looking for something I can do on the stove thats not got a ton of fat -- And they'll totally help you out. And they'll change the package sizes of anything you want! Want a quarter lb of beef? They'll package that for you.

The fruit guy is also awesome. Publix has some of the best fresh pineapple I've ever had (they also make great pre-cut salads with things like olives that my mom loves. On another note -- shes crazy for their bakery's multigrain bread -- so is my brother). The other day I walked past when he was cutting watermelon and it smelled so wonderful -- I started talking to him and he gave me some to taste and that sealed it -- I just had to get some. But I love pineapple and their pineapple is so expensive -- and their fruit mixes never have much pineapple but have tons of crap I don't want. I was talking to him about this and he was telling me how he was going to go to the manager and suggest different varieties to package and he was very interested in what I, as a customer, would purchase. This man cuts fruit at the grocery store -- and he takes his job very seriously. He made me a special mix of sliced watermelon and pineapple right there and gave me a great price on it. And today I went in and asked him if he could sell me a smaller amount of pineapple than what they had out -- I'm just me and I don't eat that much. He did -- and he was super happy to do it for me. Like really, he wasn't bothered in the slightest -- he cut me up some pineapple and made a bowl just for me -- with just like 4 cubes in it LOL -- we ended up talking for like half-an-hour. I love the fruit guy.

And their store brand products are awesome. The Publix frozen pizza is better than Digiornos or Freschetta or anything else. I love this grocery store! Hell, I'll gladly pay more to shop there -- they're so happy to accommodate you in any way they can -- even me a young college chick who doesn't even buy a ton of groceries. They're helpful and they have great quality. If you have a Publix in your area-- I highly recommend them -- 5 stars! I'm totally gonna call their manager and praise them.

Oh and what a coincidence, I was talking about this to my mom who informs me that my brother has also become hooked on Publix now that they live near one. LOL. I love my brother -- we are so much alike, it's freaky.

It's Official

Friends, It's official. I have a mullet. I was staring to build up a nice denial about it -- I even wore it down the other day. Steph, like all of you, has been trying to convince me that it's not that bad. Today she saw it in person though... and rather than get a response -- she just started laughing uncontrollably. It's so bad that she couldn't even muster up a lie.

And every time I say the word or type the word "mullet," I want to cry and laugh at the same time. The good news is that it actually looks pretty dang good when I pull it back... and you can't tell that it's a mullet. The only options I have are to pull it back for a month or two -- or get even more cut off. I really don't want to dyke out again with the super short hair -- so I guess I'll just be doing the ponytail and hair clips until Christmas.

Tis a sad day. Karen has an honest to god mullet. And I live in Alabama. Jesus Christ.

It's the cool Apple Volkswagen vibe...

Today someone asked me if I was a "Mac person" -- beacause I "give off that vibe." Seriously.

Is that a good vibe? Has to be -- right? And do I give off this vibe because I am, in fact, a Mac user or have I always reeked of superior quality, performance and style?

My weekend in a nutshell:

Friday: go to movies with a friend, stay up late watching Health channel and teaching them to steal cable.

Saturday: Wake up super early -- hit chick-fil-a for breakfast. Work. Come home - lay down for nap. Accidently "nap" until 9pm. Get up and surf net, make dinner -- try to but fail to catch even 2 minutes of sleep.

Sunday: Stare at clock wishing for sleep until time to go to work. Work (and I did HOMEWORK that isn't even due till Friday -- how fucking awesome am I doing?) Come home exhausted and lay down. Wake up at 7:15. Panic because I have to be at work! I'M LATE! Rush to get phone and call work. Freak out before realizing that it is 7:15 PM -- not AM. Go back to sleep. Wake up at 9... again. Surf Net -- watch Grey's Anatomy -- Shower. Have some OJ. Type this post. I predict more staring at the clock until time for work.

Tomorrow: Monday: Holiday: Holiday means I have to work. Get up & go to work. Come home and nap... probably until 9 again if trends continue...

Tuesday Stephs gonna come wake me up to hang out before I have class. Jack hates it when I nap. I have to completely cover myself with a blanket even if it's hot to keep him from gnawing on me in an attempt to wake his favorite playmate. I swear he'll eat me alive in my sleep. He also brings me all his toys (and yall, I'm posting about the cat -- you can assume the thing has plenty of toys) and drops them on my face. He wails in my ear & pounces on me or just walks in circles on top of me until I respond in some way. I swear -- when the alarm starts going off and he knows its wake-up time -- it's like open season.

Hire the Cracker Barrel people.

I drive past a Cracker Barrel on my way home everyday. Well, it's a Cracker Barrel now -- a month ago it was a structure and before that it was a parking lot with no hint of anything. They went from nothing at all to a full on restaurant in like 2 months. These contractors need to work everywhere! Man -- a building on UAH campus has been under construction for over a year -- hire the damn cracker barrel people and that thing will be ready for classes next month. Same for the bank thats been nothing but a metal frame for longer than the new restaurant has even been in construction.

It was nothing -- then one day it was a structure -- then one day it had an outside -- and patios -- and now there's a painted parking lot and handicapped parking spaces and brass handles on the door. THATS HOW YOU DO IT.

Hire the Cracker Barrel people -- they're totally on the ball here.

Sing it with me now!

I'm watching an old rerun of SNL from last year around Christmas. Jack Black is hosting and just opened it with a "song he wrote for King Kong." I know this is just a parody kinda thing -- but hey -- wasn't the entire Tenacious D album just a big parody? The King Kong song rocks, dammit -- I wish I could download it on iTunes! It's even catchy. I <3 Jack Black.

On another note (why do all my posts lately have random things compiled together as a "post"), After purchasing a concert ticket today, I decided to check up on what one of my other favorite bands were up to. So I hopped on over to to see what's up in their world. And holy shit -- they have a brand new CD coming out on Tuesday! What luck! I didn't even know they had a new CD coming out -- and now here I've only got to wait a few days. NICE.

Good News

I sold my first eBay item! The butterflies still didn't sell, nor did the plaid cross so my dream of my stained glass hobby supporting itself through eBay has been crushed. However I did make a small amount on the Antique glass cross. Not enough to pay for all the materials I used to make them all and list them, but still it's rewarding. I guess this means I get to keep the butterflies for myself ;)

I also scored my mom an AWESOME ticket to see Third Day. Isn't it unfair when your mother is going to see your favorite band in concert without you? Yeah -- unfair & weird. But I can't go because it's on a Thursday. Who knows why anyone would schedule a concert on a Thursday but whatever. Mom still wants to go so I bought the ticket for her as an apology for missing it myself. She really loves seeing them with me -- and she won't go with anyone else so shes going to go alone. I got her a center stage 3rd row aisle seat. We've had better seats -- when we were guests of the band ;) But I've never been able to purchase such a good seat for myself. I once stood in line outside of the venue 2 hours before the tickets went on sale and still only got 4th row!

So here's to the odd fact that I just purchased a great ticket for my mother to see my favorite band without me. Woo! Now if I could just convince Mark that he should give my mom a shoutout... ;)

Christmas vacation christmas vacation christmas vacation

(If you don't know how to sing the title -- then you don't know the greatest movie in the world)

Holidays are coming! I'll tell you what --if the stores were already stocking pumpkins, I'd be decorating for autumn/harvest & Halloween! I love pumpkins -- I'm going to buy lots of them for my apartment the second they hit the stores -- big ones and little ones. I'll just buy like 1 every time I go to the store so I keep up in fresh ones and so I don't have to haul them all up the stairs at once. October is my favorite month, you know -- and Fall/Autumn/Havest is my absolute favorite season!

And as soon as November hits, I'll be justified in putting up my Christmas tree! And I've got a great idea. Putting up the Christmas tree on Thanksgiving day has always been a tradition in my family. There's the nightmare of untangling the lights and fluffing the tree branches -- then hanging the lights -- then tucking the lights which is always a huge drama. Then hanging ornaments which would normally be fun except that everyones always in a bad mood by then. But the ornaments is the special part.

The Christmas ornaments are widely varied -- all colorful -- some bought -- some made -- some older than myself. Lots of the ornaments are running jokes in my family -- a joke that gets to be relived for a month out of the year -- year after year after year. Actually -- there's a lot of those. Putting up the tree is always a riot in a way. There's C's ornament she made in school with a picture of her head -- lord I'm laughing thinking of it. There's my toilet paper angel -- and lord help -- the satanic reindeer. Then there are the others -- lots of them gifts -- and almost all of them have some memory attached. There isn't a single ornament in the box that we can't remember where it came from, when we got it, and what the story is. And we relive these moments and stories every year -- I've done it for 23 years now.

So ornaments are special to me. They're not something you can just run out to the store and buy. The most gorgeous designer tree could never compare to a tree filled with love and memories on every branch. And now that I've got my own place... my own tree -- It's time to start building my collection or ornaments. The box I'll pull out year after year -- the ornaments that will hang on my tree 20 years from now which will bring back memories that I'll recall with my children & family & friends. The ornaments that I can't just go out to the store and buy -- it doesn't work that way. So -- that's where my plan comes in.

I'm a November baby -- so here's the idea: For my birthday, I'm asking everyone to give me an ornament for my tree. It doesn't have to be expensive -- it doesn't even have to be from a store. And I'll make a set of ornaments -- one for each person in my family -- and these will be the beginnings of my collection. I want to be able to pick up an ornament 30 years from now and tell my kids that their Aunt C gave me this ornament the very first year I lived in my own apartment -- when I was in college and worked at the police department -- and lived in the apartment where my balcony was right next to the gas-station and down the street from the gay-nightclub.

And you can help too! I'm asking everyone -- anyone who wants to help me out with my collection. Stephs gonna give me one! And if any of you want to -- you can too! And that way it can be the ornament that a friend in ____ sent me. It can be bought or made -- traditional or not. And if you can, I'd like it to be signed with the year. Who knows -- maybe yall will be in a shop and see a cute little Beetle ornament and send it my way :) Drop me an email if you want to live on my Christmas tree for years to come. I'd much appreciate it.

Crank sucks: negative stars.

I saw Crank tonight with a friend. They wanted to see it -- and hey, I was just going to take a nap and have movie night with Jack. Turns out movie night with Jack would have been a better choice -- especially the nap part. Crank SUCKED. And not in the good way. It was way too lame for my taste. I was neither amused nor entertained. In fact, tapping my feet on the floor was a much more captivating pass of time. My friend liked it though -- and laughed during the movie -- so to each their own.

If you have a crush on the star (the guy from The Transporter & The Italian Job) you might want to see this one. He was running around bare-assed in a hospital gown for a good bit of it. Though for my money, The Transporter was a much better movie -- and you can't beat handsome Rob. This just.. well I wouldn't even waste the money to rent this -- hell, I wouldn't even put this in my Netflix queue. Skip it -- it might taint any scenes with handsome rob the next time you pop in The Italian Job. The movie was super lame -- SUPER lame -- so lame, in fact, that I can't even describe. It's pathetic. The effects were horrible and the way it's cut together is a nightmare. The whole thing was a big mess.

Why can't Mark Wahlberg run around bare-assed for half a movie? I'd put that in my queue.

The evening ended on a good note though -- I made pork stir-fry for dinner. It was awesome.

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