Missing a dose.

I spent last night rearranging my room. I've got to make room for Jack, you know. But the whole evening I just felt horrible.

I had a splitting headache which had started in the afternoon and only got progressively worse. I was anxious about work and school and money and who knows what else. And I was super lonely. So yeah, I felt really crappy. I even tried to pray about it, but I couldn't think straight enough to even figure out just WHY I was so upset (anxious, worried, lonely etc.)

I chalked it all up to my having just returned home after having had 3 weeks of vacation time. Plus I had to leave Jack at home after playing with him for almost a week solid. I just wanted to cry -- literally. I just didn't know how I was gonna make it. And finally, after a few hours of this, I went to sleep.

Then this morning after questioning what was the matter last night, I realized something. I forgot to take my Effexor. But wait -- yes I did. I got it from my bedroom and put it in my pocket so I could pet Jack and then go get some orange juice to take it with. So I got out of bed and looked in the pocket of my pants. There it was. Dammit.

But here's what bothers me: I only missed one dose (I take it twice a day). One dose and I go crazy. This isn't the first time it went down like that. It's not even that I just go to "normal." I go from straight normal - even happy - to depressed with a splitting headache in a matter of hours. Why? I know it deals with chemicals in your brain, but it seems to me that you should be able to go a bit more than 24 hours without it before suicide sounds fun.

Is there anyone out there who can relate to this? I'd really like to talk to someone who experiences the same thing. I once heard a guy say that when his girlfriend missed a dose she went bat-shit crazy and that's why he dumped her. I thought he was exaggerating. Now I realize he wasn't. Is there anything I can DO when that happens? I mean it seems like it would be obvious -- especially with the headaches that accompany it -- but it's not that simple. I can't think straight enough for it to even occur to me. It didn't occur to me until this morning... after I had taken it before bed. Is there a way to "buffer" it?

And for future reference: if I ever tell you I have a bit of a headache, please ask me if I took it. I won't take offense.


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