Because, believe it or not, sometimes I'm not the brightest bulb in the box

Last night dinner took me 3 tries. I was low on groceries so I figured hey, leftovers. First try: Mac & Cheese leftover from Thanksgiving. Apparently Mac & Cheese doesn't last over a week in the fridge. That was disgusting so I trashed it. Ok. So I rummage through my pantry. Second try: Cream of Chicken soup. This would have been good had I not tried to pep it up. I added mashed potatoes. I did this a lot during my 5 week hell of mushed foods -- I never thought it was gross. And as if that addition weren't bad enough, I added some protein in. Vanilla protein. Yeah, it had a grainy texture and smelled like marshmallows. I poured that one down the sink. I finally end up eating a chicken wrap.

Fast forward to tonight. Tonight I went to the grocery store -- lots of food to choose from. What do I choose? Cereal. Yum. A little after I ate it, I'm surfing the net and thinking: "Man, my stomach hurts. Why would my stomach hurt? All I had was some cereal -- that should go right on through just fine. Still hurts. All I had was some Lucky Charms -- I eat those all the time!"

Oh, wait...

Yeah. Lots of sugar in those tasty little marshmallows. Mmmm. I then spent 20 minutes on the edge of my bathtub pacing my breaths. I almost had a panic attack because of Lucky Charms. Uhuh.

Sometimes I wonder if someone is watching me and shaking their head at my incompetence. Wouldn't that suck? All those times where you look around and have a sigh of relief because no one saw. Man I live on those.


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