Shouldn't have asked

So I was gossiping with a coworker today and I asked her what people though of me. Apparently RJ thinks I have an attitude.

Dammit. I've wasted all that effort being nice to her. i even complimented her on her necklace today.

That really surprised me. No, not because I'm in denial about my attitude -- but rather because I've been rather cheerful and likable at work. I guess no matter how hard I try I will always come off that way -- maybe it's just the way I am.

Is this why I never have people to hang out with? Do I need to think hard about this or should I just write it off as one off-hand comment from a two-faced bitch? (Oh and that 'two-faced bitch' part is totally not even in my own words so don't blame that on any cheekiness from me. I don't usually differentiate my two-faced bitches from the rest of them. A bitch is a bitch.)

I don't think it's attitude per-say. I think I have a strong personality. I have an odd sense of humor and I'm bluntly honest sometimes. I also don't always feel the need to fill the silences with words. Sometimes if you ask me a yes or no question, I might just answer yes or no. That doesn't mean I'm in a bad mood or that I don't like you. If silence makes you THAT uncomfortable then strike up or a conversation or something. Reminds me of one of my old bosses who called me "short."

I've really been mulling this over in my head. I've had this misunderstanding with quite a few people in the past. And this is going to be crazy coming from someone as self-concious as myself but I think they're just people who are very self conscious. Sometimes I can talk for hours, other times I'm pretty quiet. I'm not ignoring you and I can assure you that I am listening to what you say.

Apparently RJ was talking about me and the fact that I don't like shelving books. I think she was offended by this because shelving books is what we do. Well she totally mis-quoted me. I was actually talking about how much I liked doing customer service. I like answering the phone and peoples questions and helping them find what they need. It makes me all happy when I actually find the exact book someone wanted and put it in their hands (yes, that sounds super cheesy). So Customer Service would be my favorite "job/position" if we didn't have to put books out at the same time. So for that reason, cashiering happens to be my favorite position in the store. (This was a friendly conversation a few of us were having about what parts of the job we liked best -- most people don't like dealing with the customers -- I happen to like finding their books for them). So I don't like putting the books out -- that's not attitude, that's honesty. I don't complain about it because I get paid to do it and it's my fucking job. But the fact is, no one likes putting books out -- it's a pain in the ass. So for her to use that as justification of my "attitude" kinda pisses me off.