CHRISTMAS TREE!

I'm putting up my Christmas tree! The first ornament to go on is my new heart "Christmas Together" ornament my wonderful, sweet boyfriend just gave me! How perfect and romantic is THAT? I admit it, I cried a little bit.

I know my last posts have all involved me gushing about Anthony, but I can't help it -- I'm in love :)

Time Flys

Can you believe it's November already? This semester is flying by! I mean it's almost my birthday and Thanksgiving already. I'm super ahead this year though, have one more Christmas present to make and then I'll have everyones done! Impressive, no?

Schools still stressing me out. So is the thyroid thing. I've been having a lot of symptoms I did not connect until I looked up excessive hair loss the other day. Oh hey, thats a symptoms of hypothyroidism. Oh so are the wicked leg cramps i've been having, the exhaustion, the weight gain, the irritability - yay! I tell you, Graves Disease is bull shit. I'm so upset about the losing hair thing. I thought my hair was just getting tangley and thats why I was losing so much. So I've been buying hair treatments and conditioners and all sorts of shit in hopes of stopping it. Now I find out it's my stupid thyroid -- which means I can't fix it with fancy hair products :( Great, I'm gonna be fat and bald and still a failure at school. THIS ROCKS.

Sorry, I'm a bit upset about it. I was diagnosed with thyroid problems in JANUARY. It's November -- I've tried different pills and hormones and doses, I've been radiated, I've been poked and prodded and I'm still getting NEW symptoms. Not just the ones I already had -- new ones! And my psychiatrist is harping on me about my weight gain and making me feel even worse than I already do. Like I don't hate myself for it already. I dread the psychiatrist now. Just like I dread class and the doctors and work. BLAH. Did I mention my hairs falling out? Yeah.

Ok, but lifes not all bad. Not at all actually. I'm completely in love with Anthony and love him more every day. We've been going on walks together after work, I feel good about that. He just makes me so fucking happy -- and has that weird ability to make me feel better by smiling at me or hugging me. *swoon*

Like I said, I've gotten a lot of Christmas presents made too (they're stained glass). I just have to make a cross for Jennifer and then I've got all my Christmas done! I even have a present for Anthony's parents. I'm hoping to have time to make some Christmas ornaments too. Not because I have to but because I want to. I tried this last year but it became a "have to" which sucked out all of the enjoyment for me. I'd also like to get around to making a stained glass Christmas tree. I've got little filigree ornaments, just need to make it.

My birthdays almost here! I'm hoping some friends will get together and we can do dinner and a movie or game and have red velvet cake (Sams makes the best). And balloons. I want balloons. I love balloons, they're cheap, and underrated. HINT HINT. ;)

And next month is CHRISTMAS SEASON. And my trip to Michigan!

Pumpkin!

Me and Anthony carved a pumpkin tonight :) Happy Halloween!

Anthony & I in Chattanooga

I love this picture!

Is the apocalypse here already?

I'm making sweet and sour chicken for Anthony.

Also, I am so excited about this weekend! Chattanooga with Anthony and my family.

More things that annoy Karen

You know those people who sit in class or work and constantly vibrate their legs? Yeah, those people annoy me. I find it horribly distracting. Why do you have to constantly move like that? I mean they must me burning a lot of calories -- but didn't we learn how to sit still in kindergarten? I know my kindergarten teacher wouldn't have put up with that shit while we were in a circle learning colors.

Good things are scary.

I know what you're asking me and I don't wanna give
'Cause it's safe and I know 'cause I've been here all these years
All the precious pain I hold without it there is fear
And I'm afraid when you say that you'll get me outta here

Life's been going really well for me lately. It's not perfect, I'm still fat -- but I mean lifes been looking up. And it's not just Anthony -- things have been going great.

My job just got a million times better and I'm so much more happy with it. I've already paid for all my Christmas presents and am on my way to getting them done. I had a program due today in class -- and I finished it last week. I've been getting all this free food lately at restaurants (i.e. Chilis service was so bad they gave us all our meals free. Mellow Mushroom was so slow we got free appetizers while we waited. I even got free ice cream the other day). I've been doing 4 mile walks which makes me feel good. We're doing a family weekend in Chattanooga this weekend and I'm really looking forward to it. Anthony's gonna come and it's going to be awesome.

And of course there is Anthony. I simply can't get enough of him -- lifes just better with him. I look forward to the evenings and the weekends and it helps me get through the crappy stuff. It's awesome.

I'm not used to life going so well. It's scary. I feel safe when lifes going crappy. I'm used to that. I'm afraid to relax and just be happy because I fear getting used to it. I mean if I don't let myself get used to it, it won't suck so bad when there is the inevitable nosedive, right?

I know, I'm such a pessimist. I've been burned in love before so my defense mechanisms keep kicking up and won't let me relax. I mean this is all too good to be true, right? How could someone so wonderful be in love with ME?

Ribbon Angel

These are the ribbon angels I'm making my family for Christmas. The design is not mine, found them for sale on another site much smaller for $30.

Jack and Anthony are watching football.

Jack and Anthony are watching the Michigan game on TV. It's so cute!

In other news: I made two Christmas presents today. Yay me! We're going to do a Thanks-Christmas on Thanksgiving this year so I need to have my presents ready by then. I'm making yellow ribbon angels in support of my sister who is going to Afghanistan next month.

Happy October!

This is my fall center piece this year. I love it!